Slacking days

Dear diary,

School has begun... i had received my timetable n only thursday was the worst. my lesson end at 4pm on thursday... the rest erm.. mon is 1, tue n wed is 12.30 n fri is 12. quite slack la but hate thursday which is tml. Right now i'm ore worried about my coming gp test on friday ( think i will fail lo.. so long nv touch gp stuff as in do compre nor essay). Moreover, my gp tutor says no one is to fail the essay. These three days i m still in holiday mood la .. coe home n sleep like nobody business. yesterday i watched hide n seek n inital d. yupz... den today i slept for 2 n a half hour. After dinner, i went to pack my math file cos i'm the 'lucky' one to be picked for checking!~ nvm.. luckily tt i've already organised my stuff so it's rather easy just that later have to do corrections.hmm... tried to do my math assignment 33 but i see the first question n it's cracking my brains. I chose to ignore n went to watch tv n right now i'm online n watching tennis. On monday, i had tennis with mum n her friends. I love playing tennis! it's so much fun.. lots of fun! But i have a very bad habit tt is i dun like to run for the balls.. so i'll be like waiting the balls to come if not i wun hit it. Mum says i gonna change.. yupz i agree! Interhouse is coming. n i hope i can play well n sure must enjoy it! Think tonight will be stuck in front of my tv le. Wanna watch superstar n tennis. this week still not in the mood of studying... rest for one or two more weeks den try to go back my normal ba. Just hope i dun slack too much... got back my math paper. I'm quite satified with my results - 70.5,, all b'coz of my careless mistakes. hmm i have gone through my paper n make ralli alot of stupid careless mistakes. well, just make sure my a levels dun repeat the same mistakes can le right? So i sort of achieve one of my aim for this mid year ... keep going on adeline!!! Today though the day is short in school but alot of things to learn.. gosh! environment chem seems so tireous... econ is like blur. had stress management n haha i fit in all the catergories lor.. must be i very stress lol. haha.. hope it's not! sian first day of sch.. ms yamuna is there to remind us that a levels is like abt 3 months away... ok but thanks to her i need to wake up real soon away from my holiday mood.


@de|ine=> holiday mood

My days...

Dear diary,

I had just completed my mid year exams on thursday... it's like another miracle that i have gone through it. my last paper was the worst cos economics ended late den left just a few hours to study before the day ends. as usual, i try my best to keep myself awake so that i can look through at least once for all the topics. In the end, i studied till 4am, at that point of time, i no longer felt sleepy but still i think i need some sleep otherwise tml take paper will sleep haha so i slept. the next day i woke up, i was shocked! I saw myself as white as sheet, i was in a daze the whole morning till i reached school. i felt better le. After the paper, i went home. thanks dad n mum for fetching me home everyday of my papers... love ya! Because of u, i'm able to study well. hopefully i dun bring disappointment to you guys. Blessed me! After chem, i felt so relief. But i just wasn't feeling well, having my cramps .. making me no strength nor any energy at all. actually meli n i were suppose to go out n have fun but both of us were like so sian so nv go out. I came home n watch tv, lie on my sofa...soon my parents went out. i was addicted to this wonderful programme - photoimage so i was playing with it for like 3 to 4 hours. throughout the hours, i just dun feel like walking anywhere, only sit down in front of my computer. I realised i haven had a proper meal till 6 plus when my parents were back.
The next day which is friday, i went out to k-box with my fren, den we go shopping, took neo prints... (to daddy, haha thanks for the exra cash u gave me... u said to keep it a secret but in the end u told mummy lol) I bought a pair of earrings which was at sales . it's a big ring.. at first thought it looks alright but when i tried it at home it was very big la. Saw lots of stuffs i wanna buy but they r damn expensive! i told my self that next time i must earn lots of money so that i can buy whatever i like whahaha. ok.. i'm being mad right now.. having a very big bubble above my head. since young got so many dreams for the future... but very likely they are not fulfil. ok.. i'm tired le. shall stop here. goodnitez!

All Smiles!

Dear diary,

I had a great time today... but lazy to write haha. Thank u for giving me such a wonderful day! I'm all smiles... :)

@de|ine => all smiles..

Stress!!!

Dear diary,

I've been studying real hard for next week mid year... i'm studying of an average of at least 7 hours per day .. can u imagaine tt? i nv tired studying for so many many days of at least 7 hours.. gosh! I ate alot too... first time eh. usually near exam period i dun eat alot de... den will lose some weight haha.. but this time i eat alot lor. pray hard my weight dun increase... hmmm but got a few days i ate quite healthily... got influence by my gf to eat wheat bread lol. tastes yummy!!! I have look through all the topics once le... the problem now is memorising my facts! I'm really a wooden block eh... always must memorise stuffs den can .. since secondary school. i can never understand anything. Argh! hate myself for doing so.. everyone says it's not good... esp for econs is like how to memorise? so many many things.. i really dunno where to start from! ANGRY~ this week i only spend 2 days on math yet i am aiming quite high for math. hai~ so contradict right? maybe i shld just aim all pass can le.. so that my disappointment will not be great. Heard from gf that math will be difficult for this mid year... Damn stress !! recently i've been waking up real early in the monring cos i couldn't slp well but i felt so tired.. den i sleep quite late at night with my tv on cos i could not slp! yesterday i suddenly felt a strong feeling.. it's difficult to describe. my mind is totally in a blank... den all i wanted to do is to grab something to hang on. i felt so weak that i feel like collapsing... very very weird... den in a split second, i was alright den i was sitting in front of my sofa. WEIRD! is this a sign of depression or stress.. something is wrong!~ hmmm still wanna wish myself all the best. four more days to the horrorifying papers.

@de|ine=> down at the bottom of the sea searching for pearls!

I'm elated!!

Dear diary,

i'm feeling elated right now hee... cos i just came home from town. whaha... went out with my friend den we go bugis n orchard. lol.. bought a roxy shirt den we took neoprints. lol.. very nice wor but cannot show ppl :( hmm.. we went out at 6pm den reach home onli at 10.30. very unlucky .. we just reach bugis mrt station den my slipper spoil lor.. but i still wear it till i reached home though quite difficult to walk. haha.. cos onli bring 30 buck den dun wanna spent on slippers. Hmm... we went to bugis village n shop. actually is to relieve stress la today go out... i did math today n complex numbers really sucks! function is alright :) hmmm... tml is econ days ( i hate econ most!) what's the best thing going out is eating chocolate cake n brownies!! lol, we share hehe. den we sit at the place like quite romantic whaha ..it's really sinful having all the chocolates inside right now. opps.. these few days while i study den i eat really really alot of stuffs. think this holiday dunno gain how much weight le. die ar... plus i yesterday no tennis!! hmmm.. i keep telling myself wei le this mid year i must jia you.. but i very scare. what if i study so hard den in the end all i receive is just useless grades that does not prove my hardworkingness? *pray hard that it wun happen ok* pray pray pray... please!!! but the bad thing is i study le den i tend to forget the stuff very easily leh. hai~
i hope i can do better for math ( pray tt math paper dun so tough) den chem .. hmmm hope i can memorise the organic reactions very well. the other topics i dun care much. as for econ only aim for a pass... these are my aims for this mid year.yupz... adeline jia you!! must do it ok!
to my friend who went out with me,
i really enjoy the time we spend today cos i really felt very happy. thought the time is quite short but it's a fruitful one... first time eating such expensive chocolat cakes n brownies.. also i love the photos we took :) love ya lots!!! hee ( smiling ) *winks*

@de|ine=> reborned!

I wish i were here with you..

Dear diary,

I felt so lucky yet upset... I felt so lucky to have my parents with me cos without them, i won't be able to see the wonders of this world. I'm thankful especially to my daddy for him working so hard to give my family a comfortable life n giving us all that he could. Supporting me in my education so that i will have a better future. I love you daddy more than anything in this world ... Since young, u are always my hero. you taught me how to walk through my tough times, giving me advice n be there for me. At times, when u n i were alone talking... i felt the warmth that u gave me. The jokes that u said are so funny... u have a wonderful brain which i admire alot!!! How i wish i had too. Wishing you a Happy Father's Day! Love ya daddy...

I'm upset today cos not everyone has the chance to be enjoying celebrating Father's Day.

My dear cousin, i wanna let u know that even though ur dad has left u but he will always be there with you no matter where you go. I know just like me, our daddy place an important role in our lives. Even if everyone is there to console U, it's tough to overcome what had happened. Remember that you are not alone, i'll always be there for you . i'm just a call away from you... right now, u must be feeling lost. I dunno how to console you but hopefully soon u will become the cheerful gal like the past. Do know that your daddy will want you to be happy n move on with your life. He will always be with you.. alway~ Love ya gal.. cheer up :)
[remember to eat ok?] i'll always be there for u!

@de|ine => i'm thankful.

My tooth is hurting~

Dear diary,

My tooth is hurting so badly! Ouch!.. it has been three days , i told my parents n they just told mi to drink more water. pray hard that i'm not having my wisdom tooth cos gf says it's very painful to remove it :( Nowadays, i dun really talk alot to you le... cos talking to you just hurts me. Yesterday i had a dream... i dreamt of u being angry with me but i dunno the reason. we were suppose to sit together in the bus but u won't allow me to... so i sat behind. i suspect the reason for u being angry is b'cos perhaps u have read my blog. (If ever one day u were to see this, i wanna let u know that it's not i don't wanna talk to u abt it cos i'm so afraid to lose you someone whom was my best friend but now i wun dare to say we are... just that we are still close.) When i woke up, i pray so hard that this didn't happen at all n i'm glad that it din.. it was just a dream. Went to school for econs n got back my econ script .. i just passed. After class, we celebrated yan qin's early birthday which is on 16th june. Then, i went home, had so much hesitation when i was eating my lunch cos my tooth just hurts. After lunch which took a long time to finished eating, i went to my bed. I tried to sleep , was rocking on my bed, rolling on my bed... only managed to slp maybe after an hr. Stupid tooth!! felt like removing it so much. Woke up at 2pm. At 3pm, i went out with my carboxylic acid notes, wallet n hp. Walked around my neighbourhood for abt 30 minutes .. felt really relaxed n i wish i hadn't have to stop walking... den i walked to the linrary n sat down to read my carboxylic acid notes... went around the library n pick up a few books - poems.. i read n was so engrossed with it. some were sad but some were so encouraging... at ard 6 plos, i walked home again. Did not have my dinner cos i dun have appetite. watch tv throughout the night till 10pm,n i'm online :)No mood to study le!!! argh.. i hate exams! always feel so restricted , gulity , useless ... i always want to be free! When is the day coming? *wonder*

@deline=> it's a bad day!

Why do i feel this way?

Dear diary,

i'm feeling real down right now.. i'm lost. i feel like going out .. away from everyone cos i felt so cheated throughout my whole life. I'm not sure if this is a moment of being rash or it's really what i think is just my own feelings n imagination. just before i grumble, i would like to thanks melissa n my friends for accompanying mi out yesterday. nice to see u all again... mel n i went shopping den jx join us as usual... after that i meet my secondary school classmates( melvin, wai leong n winson) to watch movie - cursed.. i din realli know what it was about but i was frightened at some parts of the movie. den we went to eat near the esplande-makansutra. after we hav eaten , we went near to the sea, i like the feeling-the feeling of peace as the wind blows away all my troubles. Reached home only after 12am.. woke up this morning den slack slack till afternnon went shopping wif mummy. lol, we went to pray den go bugis village n i brought another top.. oh ya yes mel n i bought the same top but diff colour. quite cool ya? yupz, den we shop till 6 plus n i went to meet zy who make mi walk for so long to reach west coast park. make mi sweat like one kind! haha, but it's kinda of fun to walk with him cos he make mi laugh all the way...but still scare tt he bring mi anyhow walk ... luckily we reached there but it's like 30-45 minutes lor. the bbq was alright cos we dunno alot of ppl.. so i left shortly after mel left...
During my bus journey, i've been thinking alot... i think about my friendship with my close friend. I cried cos i felt disappointed, i felt being used, i felt like a fool... maybe all these are just my thinkings n it's unfair to say u these way cos maybe u nv feel that u treated mi like this before. Or maybe being unattached i can't feel the way u have for him.. that he is more important than ur 'best friend'. well, i can't balme u for i know what type of person he is... but i'm upset with u cos u dun realise that u have neglected ur friend. What m i to you? A ball? so when u r sad, when u r happy, when u really need someone to talk to n couldn't find one.. u'll find mi? will update someday again.. i can't take it anymore .. my eyes r hurting.. i felt so heavy, my eyes are full of liquid that i can't see what i'm typing..

Have you ever ...

Dear diary,

this morning I woke up n i just got the urge to write this...

Have you ever...

Have you ever wonder how it feels to be alone?
The feeling of nobody understands you.
The feeling of nobody cares for you.
And you don't know why are you here.

Have you ever sat down and your tears just flow?
The feeling of nobody is around you.
The feeling of being outcast by the world.
And you don't know why are you crying.

Have you ever shout at someone whom didn't anger you?
The feeling of people questioning you.
The feeling of people not trusting you.
And you don't know the reason behind.

Have you ever feel like escaping?
The feeling of being a carefree bird.
The feeling of being whom you want.
And you don't know how to realize it.

adeline
10.05a.m.
31-05-2005

In life, we encounter so many so many feelings that at times, we just didn't know how to react to them neither do we know why do we have this feeling. I think that is what makes human being special from all other livings things...

SuMmEr SeAsOnS

Dear diary,

It's the beginning of the summer seasons.. n we are supposed to be having fun in the beach or out there in town for the great singapore sales... but things just weren't mean that way for my schoolmates n mi ba. It is exactly 3 weeks away from mid year exams. I studies econ - banking and monetary . still halfway through cos i'm taking my time. so far i only remember the motives for demanding money . quite happy le.. cos at least i started. hmm.. this week, i'm gonna pick a day out to watch movie, go town n nowadays i got the urge to have another new ear hole.. (opps, m a bad gal)this friday, i'm already booked to go for a bbq so is either tml or thursday. hmm i hate going school during holidays , y can't we have our own free time! what's worst is how can they place mid year exams during june holidays? hai~..next week have to go back school! recently, i just had a haircut n i quite like it cos it makes my hair very light. Last friday, we end school at 11.30 den zhanyu bring mi out of school though it's against the school rule where we can only step out of school at 1pm. It was my first time, so i was really very scare n borrow early leave form from junyang.. When the uncle ask mi, i just show him the form .. whew, my heart was beating very fast. Hmmm.. went to far east wif mum n dad to cut my hair. the hairdresser's hair very cool! I din tell him how i wan my hair to be den he just cut n it looks nice. it's step-layer. mum saw n she says she also wanna cut. my dad was becoming very impatiet cos both of us took 2 hrs plus to had our hair cut done. i walked round far east n saw some stuffs i wanna buy but dare not ask cos dad looks rather unhappy. saw a pair of slippers for 19.90 n a top for 20+. I'm waiting for melissa to see when she free den can go n shop. yesterday had my tennis training n after palying for 45 minutes, i felt like fainting just like the other day. think i'm under the sun too long. Feels nice to pay with the new string though sometimes the sound it make sounds awful! the rest of today i will be watching tennis le. it's the tennis season! so many good n young players this french open.. got one is as young as 15 n what's cooler is tt she beats serena william! haha.. good job!! wanna see who's winning this french open think maria got a high chance as usual. russians girls are just damn good .. so many of them in the top 16.

@de|ine=> resting

Hell of a 'nice' world!

Sitting right here, my mind is so BLANK
I hate myself for being who i m right NOW
I'm not who I used to be.
Someone i DUN even wanna become...

Everytime i tried to turn around i FAILED!
All i could do is to ask WHY?
At times i just FELL down n let my TEARS flow
There isn't any STRENGTH for me to walk on

I felt so USELESS
dISAPPOINMENT goes n comes again
Each time i had to face the STORMY day
I tried to ESCAPE

When i'm all ALONE, all i do is to go to my DREAMLAND
Cos i know, that's where i wanna GO
But i know if this continue, I'll be SUFFERING all my life
Yet i can't bring myself to CHANGE it

One point of my life, i felt my fren dun TRUST me
I remember her WORDS that day.
It SADENED me but i didn't mentioned anything
Back on my bed, i thought if she was really the one i'm LOOKING for

If our FRIENDSHIP has come to a point where TRUST DOES NOT exist,
I would choose to gave up EVERYTHING including you
Cos I wouldn't want myself to get HURT again - EVER.
Ur one sentence change my THOUGHTS everytime i see u

Sometimes, i WONDER if u believe what i said
Or was it something that u just accept n said another about it
I DUNNO...
Cos all i could SENSE is the trust has gone eversince that day

Perhaps there ISN'T a real friend in this world
Everyone just wear a MASK
If so, WHY let each other to be met?
Even after meeting, someday the mask will DISAPPEAR
Soon, u'll realise that everything was just a LIE

A LIE! After so much we have gone through, it all turn out to be just a drama
Reality comes by, once again u r left alone facing the HARSH world
As much as i wanna run away, i couldn't
Only when i STOPPED breathing, i can really enter my DREAMLAND forever.

I wanna be ALONE! Leave me in my world of IMAGINATIVE friends. the ones i REALLY yearn for ... I HATE this world.. wishing i was NEVER even born!

A touching book

Dear diary,

Good morning! It's now 10.07am n i woke up about half an hour ago. had a fitfull sleep yesterday cos i slept at 10am. Pig rite? but i was tired... school ended early at 10 den once i reached home, i rested for a while den went to the hair salon. Yupz.. when i came home, i met ee mei n yuan xun. eh.. thot i was rather rude cos i like want to rush home so nv talk alot to them... yesterday was yuan xun b'day so ya.. once again happy 18th birthday! At around 5pm, i went out with my sister cynthia to city link n suntec just to walk walk lor but she looked so sleepy den like not very fun. anyway, saw some nice stuffs.. quite conteented le cos i haven't been going to town for a long time. I never buy anything eh.. haha. MiracLE.. Hmm.. this week is coming to an end soon. During one of day in this week, i was reading a book 'A Child name 'IT'' It was a nice n rather saddening book.. i took it out n read cos nothing to do .. but before i knew it, i was crying like river flowing down my cheeks. So sad.. just felt like killing the mother so as to end his horrifying life with all sorts of sufferings.. This is a true story n i can't imgine if i were the boy, how i able to take it? I think i would have just kill myself... So far, this is the only book that make me cries throughout the whole story like every a few minutes. Today. ee mei is celebrating her 18th b'day but i cannot go cos got math tuition which ended at 7.30pm. ya lor.. den i think by the time i reach there it's so late le. Hopefully, u have a great day ya? Actually felt like going cos all my secondary schools mates all there... hai~ Alright.. needa get the day started by eating my breakfast! tata

@de|ine=> afresh!

Hope i'm fine

Dear diary,

argh.. just now type halfway den hand itchy go n click on else thing! Was saying tt i haven been blogging for like 13 days le. Hmm.. this 2 weeks have been studying cos of common test but i didn't do well sob sob. Well, life is full of up n down , i haven gotten over it le. Last thursday, i pon yoga den go shopping with meli at log 1 to buy present for yvette n wenli. we walk for a long time den cannot find till we went to more than words. Wah.. i must say meli is a great shopper . she grabs thing as if it is free wor. Haha.. we manage to bought their gifts den i walk to one of the shops we went in just now to buy my favourite collection - earrings . whaha.. it's cheap la so i buy hee. i gave meli one . hte next day she wore it but teacher says cannot. den sun had my usual training but what is special is that i broke my string... after playing so long finally i broke it yea so happy! haha.. think others will think i'm mad but it's a good sign!~ Den monday we got release early.. slacker ms yamuna lol. but continue to do so! K... back to today, i had my guitar lesson den we r learning on two songs.. qing fei de yi n guan huai fang shi. I think guan huai fang shi easier but still my fingers r hurting... ouch. Wonder when den can i play the song fast enough... alright enough for today le.. i wanna do watch tv den maybe later go try out my guitar again.. den see needa do econ anot. hope i dun need to den today can slack whaha.. this week i'm a big time slacker cos usually i'm just a slacker. haha.. lame. tml got tennis wif mum... n yoga in sch (bore)

@de|ine=> i'm happy

When will i be motivated? continuation...

Dear diary,

I'm continuing what happen during my long weekend. On monday, i woke up at about 9 plus so thati can study economics. But this alway happen... during the public holidays n weekends, my sisters whom i'm saring room with always wake up very late. Then i cannot study lor cos if i switch on the light den they wil complain , also i need to turn on the music to study. Thot i can study outside but dad is using the computer n turning on his music till so loud. I was quite angry then cos this house does not provide a good environment den no one cares about you la. I went into my room, pack my bag n went out of the house. I went to delifrance at anchorpoint , bought ice mocha n sat down . Thoughts running through my mind.. really thought og leaving the house after what have happen. It may be a small thing but at that point of time, i couldn't help it but thinking that it doesn't matter if i'm part of the family anot.

The econ test was ok but i dunno if i can pass it cos case study is so tough la. been having the urge to play tennis today so i sms my mum during econ to ask her book tennis court tmr. I totally forget that friday got chem test la but nvm .. i miss playing tennis.
Had my guitar lessonm today.. i finally learn how to play some chords hmm : C, D Em , G.. but my fingers are hurting le. sob sob.. painful~ must have determination!

@de|ine=> wanna slack!

When will i be motivated?

Dear diary,

Had my economics common test n chemistry class test today... My long weekend has just ended but i didn't enjoyed it at all. I started to read econ on saturday for the whole morning n i was really very frustated cos i could not figure a single thing out! After reading topic 3 - national in come accounting, i sat down at my bed. I just felt like crying. Questions flooded my head making me dizzy that i just wanna faint. I asked myself if i were so stupid n brainless that i could not even know what i'm reading? Was it my fault that i'm in this state.. hai~ perhaps ba.. if only i had not choose this subject den things might not be as bad. After being angry with myself, i had no choice but to turn to my friends.. looking through my hp contacts, i called cheryl. Den ask her if sunday she is free to study together den she can teach mi.. luckily she agreed! thanks alot cheryl.
On sunday, i went for tennis training without breakfast... Michelle wanna study chemistry so cannot make it for tennis training so i was alone.. i must say that training alone is tough n tiring. near to the end of the training, i was like so wobbly n my sight seems to be blurrin g so i have to ask my coach to stop. Most likely is due to me not have my breakfast.. thanks to guanghui having that muffin with him . haha. i ate half of it n felt much better. Went off to macdonald to meet cheryl .. den we ate n started studying at 11.30 till 5.30. I began to understand abit more n was rather happy although haven i memorise my facts. We did slack for like an hour n a half , went to boon lay shopping to buy kinder also we share filet meal at about 3 plus. Cheryl was sick den she brought a 1.5L of water to mac. lol.. i would not dare to bring it cos like very funny but after seeing her doing that.. next time if i'm not feeling well, i might do that too. That night, i was in my aunt house cos they are celebrating early mother's day. Didn't wanna go cos i hot study for my test more important but i went cos mum was not happy about it. As expected, going there is a waste of my time . But i chatted with my cousins who are 23 n 22 years old .. they used to be in jjc too. Talking to them make me feel that i'm going to flunk my A Levels... It was 11.30pm n i wanted to go home le so that i can study so went to hurry my parents but they drag till 1.30 lo. argh.. sometimes they just dun understand our thinking. At that point of time, i felt like 'scolding' them... telling them if i were to fail my grades is not my fault but theirs! of cos i didn't, if i were to say that i will regret in the future..so better not be rash. think i stop here n continue another day.. the long weekend just wasn't good at all.. so many thoughts n things happening.. i wish i m alone at times.

@de|ine=> tired but still hanging on..

Tired!~

Dear diary,

Ooo.. it's been long since i blog ya? hmm.. too busy with my tennis training n school stuff ba. Anyway, my tennis tournament is ocming to an end next wednesday which is against acjc. however, i'm not playing cos i'll be learning my guitar :) On friday, we had a match against nyjc n we won hee.. 5-0. For my game, sim yee n I beat them with 9-4. i'm elated cos it's my first match that i won in tennis since i only took up tennis last year. Yesterday, i woke up at 8.30 den was busy with melissa's gifts as she is celebrating her birthday in the evening (bbq). I went to ikea to buy boxes to put her presents... n went to buy the card. well, i bought a total of 18 gifts for her as it was her 18th year old b'day. this is my 2nd year celebrating her birhtday .. only got to know her last year in jjc. I'm thankful to have such a wonderful fren who came along in my journey n walk mi thru sunshine n storm. I liked a few gifts that i gave her which includes the photo alblum, diary ( which i make it as though it was not opend yet) , a heart shape pedant that can place photo inside and a voice recordable bear. In fact i liked all that i gave her... We had lots of fun in her bbq , after dinner our class played games - mr wolf n stepping ballons. sounds so childish right? but... it's always good to have some childhood memories right? Went home only at 11.40 den we reached the bus stop near 12 which we thot we had missed the last bus. luckily, we didn't! lol.. slept in the bus den reach home when it is abt 12.45 ba. This morning i woke up late for my tennis training.. but glad that my parents sent mi over otherwise i dun have to train le. I left at 9.30 to mac at boon lay there to have breakfast with my frens. practically, i'be been doing nothing except sleeping n eating throughout the day till now. recently i hvae sign up for two idp courses - pop guitar n songwriting.. hope i dun regret making this decision as this year i'm having A levels n i'll be spending 4 hours a week for a month learning this extra courses. I doubt i'll have time to blog sooner as week 7 is a very busy week.. all the test coming up. Hai~ i hate tests!!!

@DE|INE=> i wanna slack..

I'm free!

Dear diary,

Remember the friendly match i mentioned? Ya.. it was cancelled due to the continuous rain. We waited for 2 hours n it was cancelled!! waste our time... after that the whole team went to habour front. it was rather cool i mean.. every one wearing our team shirt. there is really a bond between each and every of us though we might not know each other very well. Had macdonalds for breakfast.. taste yummy! i just love mac breakfast :) Saturday was just another sleepy day!
On sunday, i had tennis in the morning , took a bath n meet wenda at 12/45 to go tow. Woo.. i felt so happy tt day cos very long nv go town le. We went to bugis , ate lunch. I ate curry chicken rice but i realised that i were eating very ungracefully cos i dunno how to use the fork n spoon to tear the chicken. In the end, i gave up n ate only the potatoes. haha... we spent like 3 to 4 hours in that shopping centre. There were many nice shops that we visited... n as a earrings lover, i bought 3 pairs that day. One is for my best pal de. Nowadays, i'm into butterflies! They r so beautiful - of different colours n their wings r amazing! We also went to bugis village n saw many nice tops... wan to buy but no money eh! i wann to go work so that i can go out n buy all the stuffs i love! Had a offer from my sister to give tuition to her friend's brother who is primary 1. but i think better not cos when a levels i coing, i'm afraid i will neglect him so i rejected.
Can't remember what i did on monday.. like got something on after sch but i just couldn't remember what was it. nvm
Tuesday - had tennis training after a day of boring school. had lessons til 4 but only a total of 1 hour break! we had a change of gp tutor to mr goon who always make mi wanna laugh cos of his expression. tennis training was fun yet tiring... went home to have my dinner , watch tv n fell asleep while studying for econs.
Wednesday- ended school very early today at 12.30. wanted to leave school but there is so called sercurity guard to guard the gate as we can only leave school only at 2pm! Argh.. stupid school rule.. it's noy as if we wil study during this 1 n a half hour la. All we do is to walk around the school n find how to escape from this 'prison' hai~... too bad a prison is hard to find an exit. Went home n sleep for 3 hours ... very shiok eh! did abit of math den now i'm online to think of how to make a birthday card for my angel... whose b'day is tml! I'm off to watch tv le! tata..

@de|ine= > feeling normal..

RaInInG dAy

Dear diary,

Good morning! It 7.50am now n the weather is rather cold cos it's raining!I'm in my tennis outfit cos will be going to sajc for a friendly soon. Hope the rain will stop den we can play :) Quite excited n nervous about it cos today is our last friendly plus sajc is also part of our grouping... so it's vital.Just msg grace that it's raining heavily den she replies that we stil have to go down n wait for the rain to stop. yupz... haven been sleeping for 9 hours le.. yesterday after tennis training, i went home.. bathe, wath tv n drop dead on my bed at 10 sharp. haha... this morning suddenly woke up by myself without the alarm clock at 7. If only, i can sleep so early everyday... i wun have to fall asleep in class or lectures. anyway. i got to get going cos we r meeting at 8.30am. good luck!!!

@de|ine=> fresh!

a 3 day weekend

Dear diary,

I'm still down wif my flu and cough... nevertheless i still go for my tennis trainings these few days. Yesterday, we are seperated into two teams. Mi n michelle were seperated so i partner Ice. Quite surprisely we were losing 3-1 to sim yee n xiang ying n yet recover to have a tie break with them n won 4-3 :)den we won again with 4-1. hmm.. luck is with us ba i guess.. first time partner still went quite smoothly. Went for tuition den wanted to change my tennis skorts to small but they no have small size le.. i wonder how to wear for tournament specially with the tennis ball in it.
Today, i did some work -chem tutorial n assignment 25 for math but i'm always stuck with math. On good friday, went out with law to study but i only study abit den keep disturbing him haha... sorry wor. He was stuck in one question den keep wanting to solve it. If i were him, i would have skip the qns...saw keng ee n mao in achorpoint.. so sweet. After studying, we went to this shop 'art frenzy'. My eyes were captivated by many wonderful art stuff. i bought some to make sth to my friends this coming apirl - my angel n my best pal... i tried doing it today but it fail so i guess i just make a simple one will do.
Apirl is coming n i'm not at least 1% confident tt i can do my a level well.

@de|ine=> once a solution came... another problem come along...

A day off

Dear diary,

I'm sick.. had chemistry test this morning. I hope i can pass.. cos i dunno if i really know how to do it anot. After that, i decided to go home n rest cos i dun think i can absorb any further for the day. Yesterday, i was mugging for my chemistry test in school cos i meet my angel to study together at 4. BUt i'm so sorry that i have to go home first cos i'm running a fever. Yupz.. will make it up to you ok? cheers... Took only half an hour of sleep den started to mug till 9 n watch tv for 45 minutes. I studied till 12.. the topic periodity is so difficult to memorised! I couild no longer take it so went to slp le.. wanted to wake up at 5 but i went to bed instead.
Today,i did practically nothing but just resting. went for my last chem tuition n it was boring cos it's about ionic eqm. dun understand a single thing. Wonder tml if i can skip pc anot.. but needa get mc leh. argh.. dislike go to the doctor, waste money only! tml going chinatown , hopefully is not a boring trip.

@de|ine => dizzy

NoThiNg iMPoRtAnT

DeaR dIaRY,

I din managed to say sorry to daddy personally cos i nv had the courage to do that but my parents never said anything to me about my handphone. Hopefully, this is a good sign. I hope that they dun think i take my handphone as for granted cos i'm really remorseful about it.I kept real quiet throughout the night since i reached home, really dunno what to do. The time noe is 8.38 in the morning... is just another brand new day n may it be a fine day :)

@de|ine => praying for a nice day

jUsT a baD bAd DaY!

dear diary,

i'm feeling down~ was feeling really good this morning though i were tired. had my tennis training.. n the sun is really scorching. Had a game with xiangying n sim yee.. had some great shots though mi n micheele lost but there were 2 sudden death! hmm.. after tennis, i went with michelle to meet her friend, wen jie. i dun wanna accompany her for lunch de.. but she pulled mi along cos she said i'll be eating alone den. I dun wanna follow cos they having fish n co la.. is like so ex n only have 10 bucks to spend. In the end, the guy paid but i will pay him back when i meet him in school. all of us din manage to finish the food coz it's a big serving. after that, we went to mac cafe to study.. saw lawrence but he nv see mi so nvm . the most uninteresting n worst thing that happen to mi is that i lost my handphone... we decided to watch a movie so went up to buy tickets for the show.. son of the mask? i think so la.. the show is abt 7 plus. as it was still early, my fren suggest to go to the arcade to play. n so we went... n sat down on this machine. i place my bag on the floor next to my seat... n started playing. I must be too engross in the game that i din realise my hp was stolen :( after the game den i was looing for my hp n b4 i knew it.. it was GONE! i walked back to find.. thot i dropped it. n saw this boy looking at mi ... he looks guilty! but i can't confront him cos no prooF! hai~... was really afraid but still i had to tell my dad about it. i din go for the movie n haven eat my dinner.. no mood to do anything. So i went home instead... felt so stupid. i keep thinking about it in the bus i tears just roll down. If only i were more careful den this wouldn't had happen. argh... i hate today. mum called michelle hp when we were walking in jp...n she like very frustrated la. she ask mi abt it.. den says u kids all so troublesome! korkor fell sick den ur sister was complaining about her hair n u said u lose ur hp! i was speechless... i'm really sorry about losing my hp n creating so much trouble for u , dad n mum... really sorry! well, the least i can do is to pay for my new handphone if only u allow mi to have another one. otherwise i'm fine with it cos i know it's my fault.

@de|ine => i wish today din happen at all...

cAn i DroP a tEaR?

Dear diary,
well, i dun feel like writing my fellings here today as i wanted to keep it more personally.. so just wanna say tt i learnt a number of lessons today. the most important lesson i learn is that life is unfair...

@de|ine => hidden fellings.

I waNnA B A NOTi gaL

Dear diary,

i dislike the life i m having now cos most of my time revolve around studies n more studying! LaSt saturaday was an interesting day .. in the morning my school have a carnival -Love Fiesta ||. My class sold cup corn n taiwan sauguages.. it sold pretty well. Within 3.5 hrs, we have finished selling the taiwan sauguages(300)- wanna thanks my classmates for being under the sun to bbq them. Hmm... i did henna , n had some glitter thingy on my hand as well as hair wrap which was not done pretty well but it's still nice. hee... i left for home to rest as i still have tuition at 4-6. After tuition, i went to meet elmo n guys cos it was elmo's birthday :) Being together with my secondary friends has always been wonderful. We had dinner at marina bay den initally they decided to go atch a movie but then it was boring. So ... shili, lyn they all suggest to go Party World which is a KTV. Hmm.. i was thinking if i should go or rather can i go? cos if i go , i will have to go home very late. Also , i dare not tell my mum. In the end, i went n told my mum that i will be home late. Had fun in the Ktv, it was my first time singing in a ktv cos i always dun dare to sing haha.. we sang birthday song n cut cake in the ktv. I was quite sleepy so fell asleep for a little while. lol... onli till 3 am den we left the place. When i was in the ltv, lots of thoughts went through my mind.. i really enjoyed myself over there. I wasn't thinking about school work nor any problems i have. it was truly a time i m who m i. the gal who enjoys music n want to lead a carefree life. But as the saying goes , all good things come to an end. I still have to face reality once it's over... took a cab home with thiratch, elmo n yuan xun. Met my brother , he was inside the pub n saw him through the glass. Haha... den i sms him not to tell mummy that i came home this late. Slept at around 4 am den woke up 12 the next day. It's just another school day - cos i hvae to do all my homework n stuff. As usual, i wasn't in the mood to do it. On monday, i can;t relly remeber what happen but know that i was studying for my economic ' game' the next day. Hai~ wanna say sorry to my team mate.. i score 0 during the game cos i onli get 1 right yet i got a yellow card! argh.. econ sucks.
Today, had an interesting lesson during chinese though i did fell asleep as usual but at least i remember the stuff i learn cos the lecturer was really lame n funny. During pc, we did 2 rounds of warm up den do abt 20 incline which i was bad at it haha.. n shutter run. lol.. my reaction very slow eh. haha... den we have to run 400m below 2 minutes - 2 set. It was very awkard cos the 1st round i really run quite fast but yet the timing is like 1.49 den the second got a condition -if nv run below 2m, will have to run an extra round. I guess sometime some stress is useful.. everyone was afraid cos we were really tired. Ah ha.. i ran despite feeling tired n the timing was better- 1.40. I felt elated! Today i felt so embarrassed cos i was about to alight the bus on my way home so i stood up in the bus. Suddenly, the bus brake n i was in an unstable condition n i went forward thus banging into this guy. it was so ... n i said sorry thrice. aiyo den went to cold storage with my mum... n saw some sale display items. I took one of the item den place it back but when i place it back, i accidentally knock another item which went down like a domanio( dunno how to spell). Lucky no one saw so i pick up those which fell onto the ground n place it nicely on the shelf.
Lazy to do any work today so decided to slack around - tml will have tennis training den as the class treasurer, i have to go n count how much profit my class made for the love fiesta. tml also need to study math cos i decide to take the math retest.

@de|ine =>... strength to carry on...

mY mInd Is CoLlpaSiNG

I feel ease in the morning till i met my schoolmate n my whole day is down... was attending chemistry lecture but my heart is not in there. Tears filled my eyes... all of a sudden my notes was wet. I sent a message to someone i trust... my mind kept thinking about what is happening n what should i do but to no avail. I tried to keep myself busy but i knew i can't escape from my thoughts.. i have no control. Y must this happen to me every alternate year? I have enough! During economics lesson, i wasn't able to answer a questionpost to me cos i wasn't at all listening in class.. Wanna apologise to melissa for not being a good listener today. I know how much u wan to do it but u just couldn't, but i feel helpless too cos i couldn't offer any thing to you. I feel touched my ur mum's action... just remember not to give up on the things that u strive. I hope tomorrow will be a better day for everyone around mi... melissa, zhan yu n mi myself (though i know the road is tough, but i still wish for the best to happen)

In the middle of a uncertain situation
There's no way to find what is happening
I wish upon the stars
That I could turn everything from wrong to right
Bringing me into the world i beloved.
I m sick... :(
Need a buoy urgently..
U r not me.. u dun understand how I feel.

ade|ine => collapsing

A bOrInG sAtUrDaY

Dear diary,

I'm lost... wandering in a world of mine. I do not know what m i thinking right now. I feel flustered about nothing. Had tennis training yesterday, I felt a bit down because I just could not hit the ball with speed... just couldn't do it. I dunno what is wrong n do not know what to do. I have no idea how does the system of inter school competition goes but hope my doubles can get in cos there is 3 doubles n onli 2 qualify but we will still be in the team. During tennis, we had a drill so each of us have to play 29 balls. For every ball out or missed, we will have to do 3 push ups. Lucky me , miss 6 out of 29 which is equal to 18 push up. My serve still sucks... gotta buck up le. After tennis training, i meet my cousin to go my second aunt hse to bai nian... end up sleeping cos i were too tired. ANyway, my parents left at around 10 plus n they send both my cousins home. They wanted to send mi home too but they were late for a party in their fren hse.. so on the way to send my cousin home, there was a traffic light ( red light). JUst nice, beside there is a taxi.. my dad saw no one so he scroll down his window n wanted the uncle to stop in front so that i can take taxi home. I turned n was shocked! Cos my dad says there was nobody in the car den i turn and look. A girl with big eyes staring at me.., at that moment i really got scared.. cos she is dark with long hair n big eyes. Den my dad saw the girl n quickly scrolled up his window. Though i was terrify but it was quite funny... as the uncle look at my father as if he was drunk. End up i took another taxi home, took a bath , go online n sleep at around 12 plus. Onli to wake up near 11 this morning but soon after lunch i fell asleep at 2. Gone for tuition n only home at 6 plus.. so i slack all the while till now den wanna take my math to study but also cannot understand! So come online to blog... just now i were waching tv. saw westlife concert!!! Suddenly a impossible thought came in but i'll not say here. is a secret... lol. tml will be playing tennis .. yea! so happy... i wish i have as much pasion for tennis in my studies too .. jia you!

@de|ine => work harder..

MelissA n Mi!  

Shopping Spree...

Dear Diary,

Spend most of time today with melissa in town on a shopping spree. PLay tennis this morning n feels quite nice hee.. Took a free ride form melissa's parents down to far east. Hmm.. we reached there about 2 ba den go shop at far east first. Less than 15 minutes, we bought ourselves a sleveless shirt which cost $9.90 but when i reached home, it's abit small lor. hai~ so next time dun buy unless u had tried it. Anyway, we continued walking shop after shop n finally we were at the 1st level. N i bought a dark green dress ($39.90)though it was rather nice :P i like it! Hmm.. we walk n see n realise we had spend 2 hours in far east but nevertheless we did not forget to take neoprint which i'll be update it soon. Finally, we walk out of far east n go to wisma. went to help wenda check out a sandal, den melissa look around n found a white polor T. We decided to walk to taka but b4 that went to ebase n there we saw a few nice top. she took one n tried it.. since she is feeling rich haha.. there goes her 3rd top today. I like her top but not that cheap as i had spend almost 40 on my dress. our 3rd destination is taka but looks like there isn't much to see so we were off to our 4th - Hereen. Ah ha.. went the shop which my sister recommanded n bought another top which is green n purple something like ebase design. Melissa's big eyes caught something again.. hmm we try it n bought haha. Met rowena n her mum in the shop too buying some clothes as well. feel quite bad that we never ask rowena along.. after that melissa says enough le .. she had spent $87 bucks on 4 clothes. actually is ok la.. on average is $20 plus each.. ya. On the other hand i spend $80 on 3 tops .. wa, shopping for so long quite shiok eh. again.. we can't reisit the temptation n took another neoprint which i think is great. All good things must come to the end... her boyfren came den I went home n ate the ikea hotdog. Yummy.. yummy! Resting at home now.. waiting for tml lesson den free le on tuesday till thursday. New Year coming!! Sure gain weight de... korkor go back camp le. Hai~ he became thinner.. wonder what they do to the army boys inside...

What a down day!

Dear Diary,

The 1st two periods in school, i spend my time figuring out answers for those alien chemistry questions. Finally a hour of test, I feel quite relief that it's over but i felt upset cos i really put in effort to study but things just turn out in a negative manner. During economics lessons, i fail my duty as a student to do my homework thus got punished by standing up i the class. My first time... i have never got punished for not doing homework. I feel so disappointed with myself. Today is CCA day , n i had my tennis training today. Fell down n hurt my knee.. is abit painful but i'm alright la. All of a sudden, there's a heavy rain so we have to rush to pick up all the precious tennis balls which lead to a headache on my 1 hour journey ride home. Just cannot stand the pain... went to queensway with a a few tennis friends den head home. Fell asleep while watching tv.. n woke up with my legs numb. Once again, i felt twice within a day but this time hurt more of my injured knee. Gosh, is like 'ouch' n i spilled a glass of water on the table. dunno what happen today also.. hopefully tml will be a better day!korkor coming home tml le.. hee, scare to see him cos he might be more fit den will bully us again. haha.. tml also got dental appointment in the morning. n tuition in the afternoon evening time. looking forward to sunday for tennisn n shopping spree with my close sister - meliss haha..

@de|ine=> sleepy *yawn*

My first time

Dear Diary,

Took an early leave today at around 11.30am. well, i were not feeling well or rather i dun feel like studying today also. Slept in the bus and when i got home, i watch tv n went to my bed n sleep for another 3 hours.. really pig eh? Woke up feeling better n realise i miss lunch but nvm.. can jian fei right? haha... since i nv play tennis today. Watched Australian Open - Andy Rorrick vs Hewitt.. nice match! Hewitt won but Andy had 31 aces in total.. wow. amazing! Yesterday got thrashed terribly by United World College but i dun feel upset cos i thot i did not do so badly as expected. PLayed my first single match yesterday haha... no comments. Hmmm.. chem common test is just next week but i only studied a topic. Since school term starts, I haven had the mood to study. What is happening to mi? I dunno eh.. slack everytime. when i fail den come n think.. it's too late. Right now i could have spent my time wisely to study but i choose not to.. why? I have no answer... wanting to avoid my uncertainties perhaps. Feeling flustered with myself...

Sports week

Dear diary,

it's the weekend again just that today isHari Raya so no SCHOOL! Yea.. so happy to rest again. Hmm.. slept quite early yesterday at around 12 plus as compared to my other school day. This week I have been training tennis on tuesday n thursday. Played quite well on tuesday but yesterday I totally went off form .. really feel like throwing my racket but i din.. too expensive to do that. But was rather frustrated after all.. Luckily towards the end I was much better.. hehe. After tennis training, I drop by at the squash court.. wanna learn squash so ask my classmate to teach mi.Instead Jun Jie taught me, hmmm feel quite strange coz din know him. Never had the time to try coz my tennis gals team ask me along for dinner. Haha.. we had a free ride from our coach- Mr Low to jurong point. It was so noisy in the car with 7 girls n a guy. We end up eating in macdonald.. n i went off early cos it takes quite long to reach home n have to walk the dark road. Yupz.. hai~ 1st math common test already flunk it. Wonder how can I do well for the next few topics or A level. Today shall be a slacking day for mi, maybe later go out with my sisters to town.. hope to shop for some clothes n new stuff. haha.. not forgetting our neoprints lol. Quite long since we three sisters took picture together.. excited eh but dunno if going orchard anot cos quite boring. Hmm... alright, i needa get going le to have my lunch... hopfullu I have a great day ahead. :P

@de|ine => afresh!

Dear Diary,

I went for a haircut today n I love the my hair now hee.. so much lighter. After my haircut, I feel much better.. as in more relaxed. Don't know why also... tried to study Spa today but didn't manage to absorb much. Think tml going to be half dead le haha... cos tuesday got both spa n math. Din do anyting much as I wanted to rest... had dinner with my family just now outside. On the way hoe.. I suddently feel like sitting in the car till the next morning.. feels so nice to sit down comfortably with nothing going on my mind. Nothing much happened today except i was quite ecited about my haircut though my family says nothing change... well they are not mi so cannot feel the lightness...

@deline => daze

Thoughts running wild...

Dear diary,

I have been living in a world of a rocket... hardly a time to sit down n rest peacefully. Since Monday, time has past so fast that after tml is going to be weekend. On tuesday, I wonder what had I been doing but I knew I slept only at 2.30am. I felt so tight, I felt so depressed , I hate this world I m living in cos every second n minute I didn't enjoy at all. Why? Is it so hard to be happy... I'm not who I am outside. Yet I don'y know who m I deep inside. I lie on my bed at 2am, writing my thoughts in my handphone... I didn't know I was so flustered till I saw what I had written today
: My heartbeat stop. My mind is in a daze. I ponder. I wonder. Trains of thoughts gushing through. Hiding from reality... Unsure of myself. :"(

4 a moment I hate myself 4 worrying unneccessary. 4 a minutes, I feel frustrated. I'm afraid of the endless tml. Wanting so much 2 stay 2day 4ever. Speechless.

Can someone answer me? Give me an answer.. I need to know myself, the one deep inside . Physically n mentally I feel exhausted.

Had pc yesterday .. quite ok but my muscles ache n I feel tired when I reach home. Then today had tennis from 4 to 7... hee. My gp tutor so funny today... so slack. He seems to memorise the global map n know lot of history. Just before we end lesson, he said go for a gallery which is done by us - a mind map. Lol.. just have to walk past den can go le.. never even read lor. He also don't care.. haha. Melissa! I finally wore the tennis skirt you gave mi... lol. quite hort i must say but I really love it very much. Thanks so much... Love ya. hee. as a friend .. dun think so much. I dislike studying now.. so sian. Though I m really really very tired.. I later still have some work to catch up with. How I wish tomorrow there's no lesson.. but nope. Stil got tennis training after school. So demoralised... today I lost again but 2 sudden death n one 30-40 n we lost the point. that's how we get 4-1. Sob sob...Had a funny conversation with Mr Seah n Mr Ng, giving me so much thoughts during my bus journey...


@deline => anti-sociable.

A day out

Dear diary,

I had another 300 bucks into my bank again today... feels great. In the afternoon, I went to Clementi Big Bookshp to buy some stuff to decorate our classroom. I meet Melissa to go with me but she was late coz she went to her cousin's house to ask math. So i waited in Macdonald eating my favorite Mcflurry ice-cream n looking at the formula of differentiation. See already I almost fell asleep... den melissa came n so we go check out the stuff. In the end we decide on yellow n orange for the noticeboard at the back of the classroom, Light pink n peach for the front noticeboard n green n blue for the other side of the noticeboard. Hee.. we planned to placed a tree on the green n blue den hang all our names n baby photos on it. Yupz.. not forgetting about a corner where we can write anything on it .. haven decide the name yet. Ya.. was thinking if we should come out with a slogan for our class too. I quite excited to decorate the classroom so that everyday can have a good environment for studying. Remember the times when I were in secondary 1 and 2, our classroom always so nice like study in a big kindergarden.Very nice.. I will always remember the slogans - The best there is 2E2 n Today I am proud of 2e2, tomorrow 2e2 will be proud of me. Haha.. other ppl may think it is silly but behind all these slogans lies beautiful memories within myself.We used to stay back after school den go for lunch in a big group to macdonald, or opp coffee shop to eat our fav mee pok. haha the auntie see us always so happy cos a lot of ppl otherwise will go bukit merah hawker to eat. Yupz.. den we will chat n have fun after that will go home. I remember when we were in secondary school, there is a period of time we stay back everyday till the auntie n uncle in school have to chase us out. We were making a stall for our class for racial harmony day.. which is selling ice kacang. haha.. so we decide to make the stall out of wood n leave - kind of traditional stall n it took us weeks to complete it into a moveable stall. The stall is name as 'Peanut Haven' n we won the 1st prize as the most creative stall. Those days, we have ppl go n buy food for us n eat in class together.. go popular or elsewhere to buy materials, to find woods n pick leaves. It was a tough job but we did it all.. I'm really proud of 2e2. We nv fails to get the cleanest class award every term.. den always got free pens haha..den also everyday pass a piggy bank around to put any amount of money u want. The money is then use to buy a volley ball for us to play when we go sentosa outing. That year, we went many many times just o play volley ball as well as to buy a fountain for our two form teachers. It was a hppay year.. had chalets every year... though time has flies. It was 2 years back but I will never forget them... those memories were beyond words can say...I wish I can return to the past.

@de|ine => missing loving memories..

tired yet nice

Dear diary,

A week has gone.. school started.So far, I've been enjoying school but soon, this won't be the case anymore coz i know more exams n tests coming up meaning I will be end up the person whom I m in the past. Hai~ I duno why today I like got mood swing... early morning was so quiet den tennis that time, i so excited. hmm... wore our class new jersey! I like it alot... keke. Had foot work during tennis training n I enjoyed it alor. Sianz... everytime I play game also lose de. today also... WHY? halfway through tennis training got cramp.. ahh. I hate this! Hmm.. my time table for this year still not too bad just that on wednesday , thursday have to go home only at 6pm. On wednesday got PD, scary eh. Heard that 1st lesson needa run 8 rounds le..den on thursday is tennis hehe finally in school team le. I so happy :) On friday is cca day so anything lor.. must play till shuang den go home n sleep! lol... I'm still as lazy not wanting to do my homework today cos i just feel like slacking! Do footwork plus a set of tennis n some rallies plus 5 rounds round the track is enough n a whle of badminton is enough to beat mi out.I dun wanna continue le.. I wanna zzz.

@deline => Sleepy!

Happy New Year

The time now is 12.46am ... to ppl out there reading ==> Happy New Year!

I'm waiting for Nr Ng to pick me up for supper with Val, Bryan n his cousin... heez, but i wun be eating. Afraid of gaining weight haha... what if they tempt mi? hmm... shall see later ya. Think he should be here in half an hour time so decided to blog.
Woke up this morning with a heavy mind.. was having a headache. I woke up at 10 den watch a dvd 'Three of a kind' a chinese movie.. not that nice but ok la. After the show, i decided to went back to sleep, when i reached my room.. all of a sudden i couldn't see for like 2 seconds. I was afraid so quickly went to my bed n lie till 1.30. hmm today just dun have the mood to countdown. As normal, i slack around watching tv n lazing around my house. Chun Fong ask mi out to Boon Lay but i turn down cos quite far n it will be very crowded. Lucky nv go coz he says quite sian there n i chat with him over the phone at 10.45 till 11 plus.. haha. den came online n Mr Ng ask if wanna go supper.. hmm.. guess they will be here any time so I shall end here n shut down my computer le. I hope that my wishes will come true in this new year.. bless mi!

@de|ine => feeling normal

Heez.. cool!

Dear diary,

I will be blogging an entry on what happen yesterday. Woke up at 11am n at around 12 plus, i went with my parents and sisters to Scotts for shopping. Haha.. bought a adidas tennis outfit ( i love it very much) n 2 tops which was meant for new year.. quite early still. after that, went home for lunch n at around 4.15, i went to meet melissa to go to orchard together to meet our UWA friends. Went to Cineleisure to check out the time for 'Meet the Fockers' but Bryan n Rachel not here yet so when Bryan came, we decided to have dinner at Cafe Cartel. Ate ath like chicken curtel n had a Blue Haven drink... den we took some neoprints. It was den Melissa saw something ' Ear Piercing at $3.90' haha.. suddenly i have the urge to have my third ear hole.. so I asked melissa if she wants it. Both of us want but we are afraid of the pain.. finally yupz, we go for it. Haha.. meli says she scare so she go 1st.. after she took I feel that it is very pain coz she nv says anything. den offer to hold my hand.. b4 the 'gun' shot into my ear.. i was really scare den i felt a pinch of pain n it is done! Phew... quite ok la.. cos it last for less then 3 second. hmm.. watch 'Meet the Fockers' at 9.45pm n it lasted for about 2 hrs. Melissa's dad send mi home so I reached home at about 12am.. just in time to watch my fav hongkong drama. Been watching tv till 2 den i went to bed.. school is starting in like 3 more days yet i haven complete my homework n never started studying! Feel like a bad girl.. think my result for the test next year when school reopen will be my worst of all.

@deine => i still wanna slack!

A mErRy mErRy ChRiStMaS

It's so cool having to celebrate Christmas ... A season for giving n sharing. This year Christmas is special because I spent my time with my new friends whom I have met this year, giving and receiving presents from them. Yesterday, I went out with my sister, Cynthia to town where I went shopping for Christmas gifts. Bought presents for Melissa and family, my best n twin 'sister' . Besides that, I also bought a present for Chun Fong n Yong Shen as well as a present for my secondary gathering. After walking round n round shopping.. finally I get everything. Feels so great to buy so many gifts but if only I have more cash.. it will be even better. Lol... dream on! Reach home around 6.30 n shortly, my brother's friends came to party.. ate dinner. In between, I spend my time wrapping gifts... so fun! At around 9.15, I went to town again to change a present cos i bought wrongly... after that walk from heeren to paradiZe to meet my friend.. wow, really like traffic jam. I walk for quite sometime before finding that shopping centre which i nv heard before. Den after their game of pool.. we were off to heeren again. That's where we waited for the countdown.. every1 in town were crazy. There seems to be snow everywhere.. people's laughter ... When it is around 1.10am, i needa go home already as I afraid I could not get the last bus.. so I walk alone to the bus stop. On my way there, I was being sprayed twice all over my hair! haha.. well, since it is Christmas... of cos I just smile n try to walk as fast as I could.
I didn't magange to catch the last bus 14 n 123 or I took 111.. n walk a distance home. When I reached home, i chatted with my brother's fren who is my senior in secondary till they let ard 4 plus den off to bed.

Today is the real Christmas Day! I spent my afternoon in melissa's house for lunch. Yupz, we exchanged gifts n watch Cinderalla Story halfway.. den i went tuition. I was so sleepy thrughout.. n fell asleep many times.. think the teacher saw it but she just never say anything. N it was dman hot ar.. in the room without air con cos it is down. I was perspiring...

Presents:
Towel from my tennis coach
An anklet n an very interesting box from Yong Shen
Beautiful earrings from Michelle galfriend
A cd ( The Album) from Shili
A tennis skirt, bear, sock, message in a bottle from Melissa!
A nice handmade greetings from Valerie
Touching handmade cd greeting from Rachel
A card from yan qin
Wanna thank them for giving such a memorable Christmas 2004...

@deine=> wish that every1 had a wonderful Christmas

The worst movie ever

Finally we get new tennis net in our school court. I enjoy tennis training today :P perhaps was in a good mood ba. At 11.28am, my mum called mi asking where m i n told me that my family is going for a movie at 1.15pm which means that I have to rush home.. so took a bus for 45 minutes n reach home at ard 12.15pm. I was like a person rushing for my last train... took a quite bath n out I m in the car with my parents n elder brother without my twin sisters. Went for lunch n head to great world city to watch OCEAN TWELVE. Oh my gosh.. thought it would be something exciting... in the end... i watch till i sleep n wake up every 15 minutes. Spending an hour in the cinema, my elderly brother ask , 'Hey wanna go out anot? I dun understand the show.' I was like ' Hey thanks for asking me to watch this show la' I would be grateful to you if it was night time when I couldn't sleep . All four of us endure for another hour n it still haven finished plus totally dun understand what the show is all about! First time in my life, I walked out in the middle of the show. Besides, spending time sitting in the cinema trying to figure out what m i doing here? If anyone is reading this... please dun watch ocean twelve unless u can't fall asleep. After movie, I went home n asked my sister, cindy to go out again. So we went to Tiong Baru to buy some Christmas gifts n here she is tempting mi to eat ice-cream! haha.. well, i just love ice-cream so i ate it lor. Zi Hong, if u r reading this.. hmm i think i know what u r thinking. but just wanna tell u that i'm not haha. Walking ard Tiong Baru, we couldn't get what we want so we go to Great World City again ya.. saw so many nice stuff but i lack of cash!! This is the worst thing that could be happening.. when u see some thing that u like it so badly but u just can't afford it! For a moment i wish i won a prize with lots of cash... haha. STOP DREAMING! Just now spend my time writing n wrapping presents n came online till now... so that's all for the day. Tml is another cip day n hope to do some studying.. seriously pray that i do so...

@deine ==> dun wanna study!!!

Salvation Army!

17-12-2004

Tennis training in the morning n went to do cip again... but today i did something different. The Salvation Army :P It is much much easier than Youth Challenge. All Michelle and I need to do is to ring the bell. Initally, both of us ring the bell but Michelle one was working well n think that if we were to rinf for 6 hours.. our hands will be tired. So we took turns - 15 minutes interval.. may be short but when we are doing it, it's LONG! haha.. time passes so slowly for the 1st 3 hours but was alright the last 3 hours. Our legs hurt! so painful.. n tiring... but it's alright la. Saw many many cute little kids haha.. i remember there is this little boy around 3 years old... he keep bugging his mother to let him donate. haha... when he succeed, all i saw is a big smile. So innocence... kids are so cute n ingorance. They have no worries at all.. if only we can always remain as little children but that is impossible. After doing cip from 12 to 6 , i headed home to rest. At 9pm, i went out again to meet my secondary school friends for a late night movie. Was quite shock when my mum actually allows mi to haha... anyway, i meet them n we played pool before going for National Tressure at orchard cathy. I was quite tired after a whole day so... i fell asleep during the movie. haha... pig rite? but, i really cannot make it anymore... only to woke uo when my friend woke me up. Lol.. never in my life i slept so long in the cinema. After the movei, yuan xun , elmo n me share a cab home.. n here i m again heading to my bed ... zzzzzz

@deline => wishing for a longer holiday

A busy week

Dear diary,

I have been quite busy for this whole week.

13-12-2004
As usual, i went for my tennis traning till around 11am. I was on form that day hehe , managed to play quite well with Cheryl. Hope I will improve further... At 2 plus , i went ot Valerie's mum house to help out for the bbq in the evening, Halfway, I left to play another round of tennis with my teacher. Had our bbq at 5p.m , feel elated to meet my australia group mates again. This time round. we were not the strangers we used to be but good frens. Late at night, we went to Valerie's house, bathe n watched a movie - Honey. But I was to tired to watch so at 2.30am, i went home to zzz... quite scary to walk home alone at night though haha but it was quite funny. Coz, i fake all my way through.. pretending to be on the phone lol. By the way, wanna thanks zi hong for all his effort to make that wonderful video n the effort to burn cd for us.

14-12-2004

Had onli 4 hours of sleep.. n soon I'm in an angel costume at Raffles Place for fund raising. Haha, feels like a little girl. It was awkard initally when everyone is staring at you smiling n pointing. However, after a while it was alright. Hmm.. not as bad as i thot it was suppose to be. Walking the ballet shoes on the street is so painful... ouch. Melissa and I met Michelle n Cheryl at taka. We ate lunch in Delifrance... yummy. Then , took neo-prints together.. it was nice :P the second machine.. we have so many extra pictures that we dunno how to give each one equally. As I was rather tired, I kinda of wanna rush home to get some sleep as I have tuition at night. Feel quite bad be'cos we could have shop more. Lastly, had chemistry tuition at 7.30 n was late cos i overslept. Time pass very quickly during tuition that we only managed to complete 2 n a half question hee...


15-12-2004

As tired as i were, I still have to drag myself to the video editing course which begin at 9am. It is a tiring course. Perhaps, i were not interested ba as I slept almost half the lesson that my fren had to wake me up... haha. Had lunch with my friends at the nearby hawker center... den took bus home with lawrence. Once i reached home, had a heachache which hurts like hell... so the best thing to do is SLEEP. like a pig huh? but these few days really lack of sleep.. cannot take it already. At 6.30pm, mummy called home n ask my brother n mi to go down to raffles place.. so we took a cab down n realise she said wrongly. It was supposed to be a Raffles City. My fussy brother insist to take a cab though it's like one stop mrt onli... so I had to give way n waited for like 15 minutes n he walked away to the mrt station. Guys r that troublesome! My parents went shopping with their frens... n mum told mi she is going to buy a watch for me. heez, i were feeling quite excited till i saw the price, I went stunned! $180 dollars omg... but she bought it cos she says it's nice n can change the strap of the watch too woith 3 other colours. Love ya mummy n daddy! I also bought a white jacket. Guess today i spent quite alot on my parents... think they r in a good mood lor. Ate dinner at Raffles City food court - Chicken Katsu Curry Rice. hmm... make mi remind of the curry rice i ate in Australia in Perth City.
Tomorrow , I will be going to the library to do cip with my girlfren haha Michelle For 5 hours.. hope it goes well n pray hard that I dun feel dizzy with books around mi.

@deline --> feeling better , hoping to turn in soon :P

Fund Raising

Dear diary,

06-12-2004
I went for tennis training in the morning.. think my tennis is still the same. Hmm, what is more meaningful i did that day was a fund raising. This is introduced by one of my tennis mate- mIchelle. I went to China Court to help raisie fund on behalf of Youth Challenge. Actually it helps build up my confidence level when i have to approach strangers on the street trying to persuade them to contribute to these elderly living in redhill estates - one room flat houses. They actually live in a poor conditions where some dun even have a bed to sleep on. What I have learn from this experience is that not all wealthy people are as generous as we thought they are suppose to be. I appreciate those ordinary people whom i met on the street n i m inspire to be like them to be a kind hearted soul. I understand that the candle is expensive but is really really for a good cause... i just wish i could buy all but i'm still a student. There's nothing much i could be but at least i give all my energy to do the best i could.

a caption taken at king's park 

meli n me  

nice waterfall at orchard glory 

lunch - kebah 

scenery at KING'S PARK 

Group 3 ourside freemantle night market 

GROUP 3 after fish n chips 

ANNA N GALS 

CELT - part of uwa 

ROTTEST ISLAND 

04S23 - touring around UWA 

Currie hall 

My journey in AUSTRALIA

Finally, i'm able to blog an entry here. It's been long since i write an entry cos i went to australia from 23-11 to 5-12 which is last sunday. I really enjoy myself very much over there, n i'm glad that I had no choice but to go to Australia instead of backing out. It's worth the money goin to a whole new environment to learn more new things as well as touring around the area. Everyday is so meaningful n i realise that the pace there is slow and relaxing unlike Singapore where we have a hectic lifestyle. The teachers are are very friendly and young, lessons are interesting.


24-11-2004

MATILDA BAY
Had our mroning job to matilda bay at around 7a.m. The weather is quite chilling and is really an experience cos I haven had a chance to exercise with such a cold weather. And it feels so good! It's really a great thing to start of a wonderful day. My second day in Australia!

COTTLESLOE BEACH
Cottlesloe beach is a beautiful beach with sand that are so fine that when u stand on it, u feel like u're sinking down. Having a fastastic night scenery and it's very windy. If you are looking for a place to relax, it is definitely a great place.


25-11-2004

DEBATE
We had a debate between the guys n gals ' Men are more intelligent than women'. Haha.. of cos as smart women of today, we have proven that 'Women are equally or more intelligent than men'. Is's quite funny during our debate cos we have to be a little thick skin n prove to the guys how good we are but sad to say, these are the facts. hehe.. no offence :P

SHOPPING
This shopping mall which I never take down the name of it, is a nice place to buy stuffs during Christmas season every Thursday at night time. As you know, shops in Australia closes very early unlike Singapore, they closes at 5. yupz, during our shopping in the shoppin gmall, mi n melissa actually lose our way back to the meeting point. By the time we reach there, i were sweating like one kind haha. It was quite tiring to run with bags of stuff with us. So the moral of this is that the mall is damn big!


26-11-2004

RESEARCH
Early morning, I played crab soccer and soccer with people who are mostly from my group. Went to class as usual at 9, here I m meeting Anna. She's a very nice lady who can read our minds. As most of us were quite tired, she sparkles our day with a game which is excitig and yet stressful. Haha, my group ( Mao, Val, Meli, Rachel n Mi) lose by a point. But it's alright, we had given our best. The whole afternoon, my group spent our time in the main library which is very very big - 3 story with lots of lots of books. We're here to do our researh for our essay n I have a good tip for people out there who are lazy to copy their notes from the books. U can actually use ur camera to take the pages u like and go back and write r notes. Yupz, that's what a few of us did.

FREEMANTLE
During the evening, we set off to FREEMANTLE which is a night market. In fact, we had our dinner at one of the famous FISH N CHIPS ( cicerellos) . The servings there is big that even though melissa n I share , we couldn't even finished it. After diner, we walk around the area and took some group pictures. It was there that I almost injured Valerie . Sorry Val, :p The night market is not very big but I bought some stuff there for my friends and family. The things there are quite cheap as well. So, if any1 wans to go perth, this place u just can't miss it!

27-11-2004

It's the weekend n we were off to Orchard Glory - it's a farm with beautiful cottages and scenery. On our way there, we stop at a few area as follows :

KING'S PARK
It is here where I need to thank the agency for allowing us to get to know more about the native Australian- The Aboriginees. We actually get to see the tools that they use in the past to create entertainment for themselves as well how they go about hunting. Furthermore, they show as some of their dance steps which is very different from what we do nowadays. A few guys from my group learn to dance from them.. and I an see that they are potential dancers heez. So cute, when u see they hop around :)

CAVERSNAM WILDLIFE PARK
This wildlife park had allows me to have a closer look at some of the popluar animals in Australia- the Kolar Bear , Kangeroos as well as Wombat ( i dunno how to spell). I get to feed the kangeroos n the emi. hehe, it's ot as scary as i thought it was. At the wildlife park, i also mangaed to see the process of shaving a sheep fur n get to carry those cute little puppies.

ORCHARD GLORY
Finally, we have reached our destination and the view is really stunning! I'm amazed by what I have saw here. It's like a fairyland with nice waterfalls and cottages. It's here that I get to know more about my group members as we played lots of games - polar bear, blindman folds and many more. It's the first time I played polar bear n I survive by being a alive polar bear. haha... cool huh . I din expect it to happen as well, perhaps luck is on my side. We had bbq for dinner - hmm, there's beef, chicken wings, potatoes salad, saguages n not forgetting orange juice since it is an orange orchard. We girls, squash lots of orange to make orange juice. it's damn tiring but it's really fun cos we had no machines to help us.. so all we have is our hands. Anyway, the oranges there are sweet n tasty! At night, an astromoner taught us how to identify the different stars above. By the way, this is a fact- stars do not twinkle. Yupz, it's interesting to see the types of zodiac in the sky as well as some other names which i can't remember. After which, we continue to play games till 3a.m. n a few of us including mi went for a night walk. In the end i think left valerie and one or two other who stay up to wait for the sunrise. As a pig, I m off to sleep so as to have a better day tomorrow.

28-11-2004

WINERY
Early morning, we ate a filling breakfast n went to vist the winery, The person in charge told us more about the process of making a wine - fermentation tt's chemistry. hmm... but we didn't get a chance to drink it! So unfair, the guys get to drink. That's where our stay at ORCHARD GLORY ended.

COMOS CENTRE
We headed back to CURRIE HALL n drop by at comos centre where we get to view the other planets n the sun around the universes. It's very interesting to find out how big how universe is where there are uncountable glaxies around us.

STRAWBERRY FIELD
It's a pity we can't pick the strawberries and eat cos they spread some stuff on it today. However, I get to bought a strawberry wine back n some chocolate. I learnt that the redder the strawberries, the sweeter it is.

WILDLIFE
The last stop is at this wildlife which i dunno the name. I fed the ducks and birds here.. it's a short trip but memorable.

29-11-2004

ANTOMY and HUMAN BIOLOGY
Early morning, we went to Antomy and Human Biology which has increased my insight on Forsenic Palynology. Plants could also help solve a crime by seeing th pollen grains or spores in a plant...Over there, i also get to learn how to determine the number of days a person had died through maggots.

POLICE ACADEMY
In the afternoon, we arrive at the police academy. It's one of the best police academy here with new facilities. There's a 'manmade' village there where police recruits are being trained so as to prepare them for different situations faced in future. This village includes a bank, apartment, guardian , fastfood restaurant.... Seen a crash car where one of their colleages died on duty. It's quite heart-breaking.

30-11-2004
ROTTEST ISLAND
We spent 2 hours touring around rottest island n there are lots of surprises for mi as i get to see many many beautiful beaches so blue n green , vast n wide. Besides, Rottest Island used to be a prison for the Aboriginees in the past. And I was told more about their conditions in the prison - harsh n brutal methods were used to enforce discipline. The prisoners were treated very badly...I shall stop cos it is so saddening.

01-12-2004
Today , we did our normal routine by attending lessons n during evening we attend a lecture by a famous professor in USA. erm.. i dun really understand what he is talking. I dun deny that i fall asleep during the talk but i just can't figure out what's going on so ya.. it's better to be in a dream land. haha... opps. Had a sercret between our group n my teacher.. just wanna say that thanks for what u have decide that day. We love u!

02-12-2004

FRANCIS BURT LAW , FREEMANTLE PRISON N a EDUCATIONAL CENTRE
Hmm... i didn't quite like today cos i hate prison. ya.. but still i have to go despite what i hate about it but i shall not talk about it. Hmm.. one memorable thing i remember is the trial on a ex convict - Moodyne Joe who escapes many times from the prison. My whole group had a act on this trial n it's very funny. Lerroy sings n there are many funny stuff which happen that ends up people laughing away... Besides, we also went to the actaul court where trial are seen going on. Everyone has to keep silence throughout the whole trial. yupz, i can see some serious faces in there n an feel the tense atmosphere over there.

03-12-2004

FAREWELL PARTY
After so many days of doing our essay, our group n Mr Carl Ng who went through so many sleepless night, we finally hand up our final product. To celebrate, we had a farewell party. We gave presents to Anna who had been with us these days teaching us alot of stuff. Though she stay for a while. My group is so sweet, We send her off n rush to stand rows at the carpark... wishing her well n goodbye. Anna, you rock! At night, we did our reflection which is a sad thing but it's also very touching. It's here I realise how much I feel for everyone who comes into my life. Almost everyone share what went through the days spent in Australia. A useless person like mi was the first to cry when i read my thoughts n feelings. I still remember saying this ' Everyday seems like a series of dramas entering into my life' The days in Australia are really exciting, meaningful n most of all i have made lots of friendship bonds. I hear the many voices of graditude to people who are important to them n making this trip impossible. Most importantly, the one who will always stands out in our heart is our dear Mr Carl Ng who is every helpful n fun loving. He teaches n plays with us everyday, just like a big brother. Without him, our group would not be as united as we can right now. After our reflection, we did a sweet thing for him by singing ' LIKE A ROSE' by A1 to him. Most of us went to hug him... n many of us had tears in our eyes. Mr Ng, thanks for all the wonderful things you have done for us n I will always remember this trip. Now you are still in Australia, hope you enjoy urself! After all these sad events, it's time to PARTY! haha.. we did mass dance all the way till we are really shag n started to play games again. As alot of us are damn tired, we decided to stop n 6 of us went for a night walk at MATILDA BAY - the place where i've been to on my second day. The sky is filled with many stars.. a starry starry night. That night, when we reached back at currie hall, i couldn't fall asleep so went to chat with my teacher for almost an hour den off to sleep at 5am.

04-12-2004
SURPRISE
Early morning, we had a surprise activity which is a test on essay one that is the same as our promos paper. As much as i hated this, i still strive through but i know that i wun be any better.

PERTH CITY
The day that I have been waiting for has arrived! That's shopping for at least 5 hours! Before shopping, I went to the ART GALLERY n saw a sculpture which looks like real . Besides, there are also some interesting paintings which interest mi... Then , meli, mr ng, bryan , yan chin , soo eng n I went shopping around perth city.. we walk street after street . haha, can't believe i actually had this opportunity to do this just like movies. I bought a shirt, jean, coffee, nougats, chocolates... n ate ice cream! yummy yummy! I had one of the best meal in Austrlia - curry beef rice.

KING'S PARK
Here we are again visiting the King's Park. Saw the astonishing night view of Perth Den we did a dance n i think peopl earound there should be wondering if we are a bunch of mad people cos it's cold out there n i dun think they can even hear the music cos it's very soft...ya, at 10.20, it's time to depart n head to the airport. That's when we are departed from Mr Ng who is still staying in Perth for a week. As much as we want him to go to the airport with us, he couldn't.

AIRPORT
Bringing along those heavy lauguages, time really flies. Singapore our homeland.... When our bags are being checked, mine was being hold on n i were quite scare that time. Actaully i had 2 tools in my bag which is used to make earrings so i had to gif it to the officer there. When we checked in, i feel like being cheated cos the foods that i bought are more expensive but it's alright la. Bought a pair of ripcurl slipper there... i like it!

05-12-2004
At 12.30, we board the plane. After 5 hours, we reached Singapore... saw our loves one waiting for us... great to see all the happy faces that we have bring back to Singapore!
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